England squad.

Gottaa

Full Member
"The England team visited an orphanage in Cape Town today. "It's heartbreaking to see their sad little faces with no hope" said Jamal aged 6."

This made me laugh so much :) Excellent !

And don't put yourself down like that Janie, you seem to know lots about football ;)
 

Janie

Full Member
And don't put yourself down like that Janie, you seem to know lots about football ;)

Don't make me snap your iPad!

---

Guy walks into kink club...

Guy :'how much to be completely hulmiliated?'
Girl : �37.99
Guy : Wow that so cheap i'll take it!

Guy hands over his money, Girl hands over an England Football Shirt.

----

Guy goes to the toilet in a pub, standing at the urinal he unzips and goes to pull out his tackle, only for it to jump out and shout 'COME ON ENGLAND'. Another guy washing his hands says .....


....I've heard alot of cocks shouting that recently!
 

Cullhaven

Hernes Son
All England games are being moved to the gay adult channel as the screening of 11 arseholes being hammered for 90 minutes is deemed too explicit for ITV.
 

Cullhaven

Hernes Son
Next round Brazil will meet Spain at the soccer City Stadium, Portugal will meet Germany at the Loftus versfeld and England will meet france at the Johannesburg airport.
 

Soupytwist

Full Member
On the downside you have people who know very little about football, or care about it spouting rubbish like they are some expert because they've read something about it in the *insert paper/website* - coming out with amusing soundbites like 'over paid' (no really, how incitful - because it's clearly only English players who are paid so much.....oh no wait.). Sometimes they are so knowledgable they even know the name of a player or two!!

My boss who doesn't like or watch football has come to the conclusion based on a newspaper column he'd read (which was probably written by Lorraine Kelly or Kilroy Silk you know someone you'd expect to have important football knowledge) that because most of the players don't sing the national anthem they aren't showing enough pride. I didn't know whether to laugh or cry.
 

Gottaa

Full Member
out of interest then why don't they sing it ? I know the papers say they are stupid but even I used to be able to mouth the hymns being sung at school
 

Janie

Full Member
1. They don't know the words.
2. Singing in public is embarrassing.
3. They are deep in their thoughts.
4. Mouthing isn't singing and Lampard isn't actually mouthing the words anyway he's eating a pie.
5. If your coach is Italian and your royal family are German - what is the point?
6. THEY ARE OVERPAID AND HAVE NO PASSION IN THE SHIRT (Daily Mail tm)
7. It makes no difference to the performance.
8. It's a dirgy anthem and the lyrics are feeble.
9. You only sing when your winning.
10. At least they are standing, unlike the armchair critics!
11. John Terry always sings and he's a arsehole.
12. This is football not the Xfactor.
13. Unless she was booted straight at them, there is no chance of an England GK saving 'Our Gratious Queen'.
14. Would you want to hear Wayne Rooney sing? Just looking at him is bad enough.
15. They'd rather sing Three Lions.
16. They are saving their voice for shouting and swearing at the ref.
17. I'm confused surely The National's Anthem is 'Fake Empire'? - http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Fake_Empire
18. It is highly likely some of the players are among the high percentage of English who think the Royal Family are no longer needed.
19. They are atheists and don't believe in God.
20. Heskey doesn't need to sing, his presence alone makes the other players sing better, in particularlly Rooney.
21. We could have the best National Anthem in the world, a beautiful hymn loved by all - and Ashley Cole would still sing someone elses anthem on the side.
22. They don't sing so someone could spend 30 minutes coming up with a list of 22 reasons why the English players don't all sing the anthem. Bored much?

PS England will win tomorrow - and if it's enough to top the group we should have a fairly decent draw to the semi's (Providing the Germans also win there group).
 
Last edited:

Agravaine

Professional Slacker
It's OK - in a couple of weeks it will all be the fault of having too many dirty foreigners in the Premiership once more.

Then, in six months or so, they will be back to being some of the best players in the world.

It's hard to beat a talented team who actually play as a team when you can't. It's all but impossible when none of your outfield players can actually put in a performance.

If you can't be good, you've got to be lucky. England appear to be unlucky and utter shit.
 

Gottaa

Full Member
I think the expression is you can't polish a turd. From what little i read on it, is the blame not on the FA for not allowing the team more time together to bond and practise together? Seems dumb to pay so much for a manager then guve him such little time to work
 

Cullhaven

Hernes Son
Lets take of the only player getting any sort of crosses in and bring on a player who cant score goals to save his life. Genius.
 

Janie

Full Member
I think the expression is you can't polish a turd. From what little i read on it, is the blame not on the FA for not allowing the team more time together to bond and practise together? Seems dumb to pay so much for a manager then guve him such little time to work

Complete rubbish i'm afraid. That's how international football works.

The fact is Fabio got nearly everything wrong, right from the squad selection down to his last substitution (bring on Heskey 3 goals down). The players didn't play well, but when the manager is completely one dimentional blinkered and seems unable to change his tactics when things clearly aren't working - you have to wonder how what chance they had.

Edit : I just remenber Heskey wasn't the last substitution. SWP came on for about 3 minutes.
 

Cullhaven

Hernes Son
We dont play as a team. We have no passion. We let pressure get to us - none of our lot looked even remotely confident even while the national Anthems were being played. Managers repeatedly insist on playing square pegs in round holes even when it hasn't worked 5 or 10 times before. The manager is inflexable and cant ever admit that he might have done something wrong - Capello is still insisting that had that gol been allowed... in actuality we would still have been outplayed by an average Germany. Great managers admit that they are wrong and change things (Uncle Bobby must be rolling in his grave). Every one of our tired looking outfield players wanted 2 or 3 seconds on the ball when it came to them and virtually every time play the wrong pass to the wrong player. Our movement off the ball is atroceous - someone please tell Rooney not to just stand next to his marker when he hasnt got the ball. most of the German goals came, in part, from the excellent movement of their forwards off the ball. We have no zap or ping, for some reason dont close people down any more and remind me so much of Newcastle until last season. The manager is to blame - his decisions were pedestrian and just wrong. Surely when he saw what an arse the german keeper was making of things, Crouch and more long balls/ crosses would have beeen the way to go? But those on the pitch are just as much to blame. And it looks like he isnt resigning.
 

Gottaa

Full Member
I'm not sure what a manager off the pitch can do about complete muppets letting a goalie get a goal assist, if the team for whatever reason aren't into the game there is diddly he can do about it.

FA paid him �6m, if the press get there way he will go and the FA will pay him another �12m, is that what's best for the england game ? England are the only country who play 11 months of the year if what the news presenter said was right, others get winter breaks.

So what is wrong is a mix of FA, Fabio, Players but to try and just blame one person is simply common culture, if something goes wrong look for a scapegoat and blame everything 100% onto them (and in this case then pay them �12m). Good call by the FA to renew his contract though JUST before an event where they knew if things didn't go well they would want to sack him :D
 

Janie

Full Member
I'm not sure what a manager off the pitch can do about complete muppets letting a goalie get a goal assist, if the team for whatever reason aren't into the game there is diddly he can do about it.

The role of the manager is to get the best out of the players he picks though his tactics, his man management and his motivational skills.
Fabio didn't, England players turned up to the World Cup and looked paralyed.

Most England fans realise we most likely wouldn't win the world cup, but at least expect a level of football served up that isn't embarressing. England played 4 matches at this world cup and managed maybe 20 minutes of half decent football - the rest was complete dross.
 

Gottaa

Full Member
I totally agree Janie, they looked tired after playing constantly for the last 11 months, Fabio should have done something about that, some kind of break, or being given more than two weeks of time with them before going out there. The english fans also helped by boo'ing at the team who are after all human (overpaid but still human, barely in some of there cases I will agree).

As I said Fabio did stuff wrong but solely blaming him for everything is stupid, it's the thing I never get how a few bad games = sack the manager, but keep the underperforming players, the trainers, the top level decision makers, because after all, the best thing to do is blindly blame one aspect and throw money at it
 

Janie

Full Member
I totally agree Janie, they looked tired after playing constantly for the last 11 months

The English Prem supplied more players than any other league in the world cup - it's not just English players who come from our league. Tevez and Macherarano didn't look like they were struggling last night!
 
Top