The Lorematrix
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Time to inject a bit of levity into this forum. Yes, we know Loremasters are arguably the most disadvantaged, but let's not stop that from letting us have a good time.
In that spirit, I present the Lorematrix, a spin off on Matrix quotes, applied to our class. This was inspired by a WoW player who originally wrote the 'Shamanatrix' for the Shaman class.
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Loremaster Trainer: "Do not try and CC the wight... that's impossible. Instead, only try and realize the truth"
Loremaster: "What truth?"
Loremaster Trainer: "You have no CC."
Loremaster: "We have no CC?"
Loremaster Trainer: "Then you'll realize, it's not the wight that's dead... it's only yourself."
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Loremaster Trainer: Throughout Beta 1, we were dependent on our bear to survive. Fate, it seems, is not without a sense of irony.
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[Loremaster sees a his bear tank a mob - then a second bear getting hit.]
LM: Whoa. Deja Vu.
[Everyone freezes right in their tracks]
Guardian: What did you just say?
Loremaster: Nothing. Just had a little d�j� vu.
Minstral: What did you see?
Burgler: What happened?
Loremaster: My bear was just tanking a mob... then another bear just like it tanked another.
Minstral: How much like it? Was it the same bear?
Loremaster: It might have been. I'm not sure.
Guardian: Hunter! Champion!
Champion: What is it?
Minstral: A d�j� vu is usually a bug in the Lorematrix. It happens when they nerf something!
[One hit, the bear loses half its life]
Hunter: Get it out of there!
[Second hit, bear dies]
Loremaster: Oh no...
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Developer: I'm trying to free your minds, Loremasters. But I can only show you the /bug feature. You're the ones that have to use it.
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Developer: Loremasters, sooner or later you're going to realize just as I did that there's a difference between knowing the bugs, and fixing the bugs.
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Nazgul 1: Never send a Loremaster to do a Healer's job.
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[Loremaster comes to Primary Heal in Great Barrows]
Guardian: Loremaster... nobody has ever done this before.
Loremaster: That's why it's going to work.
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Developer: Loremasters have a problem with Undead. They believe they are special, that somehow their CC should apply to them. Obviously, they are mistaken.
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Hardy Bear: All I do is what he tells me to do. If I had to choose between that and the question marks above my head, I'd choose the question marks.
Loremaster: The question marks aren't real.
Hardy Bear: I disagree, Loremaster. I think that the question marks can be more real than this world. All I do is bug out right here, and you have to watch yourself die.
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Customer Service Representative at Turbine: It seems that you've been living two lives. One life, you're a Minstral, member of a respectable in-game Kinship. You have a unique name, pay your repair bills, and you... help your guildmaster level their Guardian. The other life is lived as an Alt, where you go by the alias "Loremaster" and are guilty of gimping nearly every Fellowship combination we have a record for. One of these lives has a future, and one of them does not.
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Nazgul 1: How did I beat you?
Loremaster: You... you're ancient evil.
Nazgul 1: Do you believe that my being Ancient Evil has anything to do with my difficulty, in this place? Do you think that's a debuff you're using now?
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Herald: I think we can handle one little wight. I sent two Loremasters, they're bringing her down now.
Captain: No, Herald, your Loremasters are already dead.
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Loremaster: You know, I know that the Fate stat does nothing. I know that when I buff up that stat, the Lorematrix is telling my brain that I'm gaining more power in combat. After 30 levels, you know what I realize?
[Puts on the +25 Fate Hat]
Loremaster: Ignorance is bliss.
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Loremaster: What are you doing?
Guardian: I'm going with you.
Loremaster: No you're not.
Guardian: No? Let me tell you what I believe. I believe that tanking means more to me than he does to you. I believe if you are really serious about having a good run, you are going to need my help. And since you can neither tank, heal, nor DPS, if you don't like it... I believe you can go to hell. Because you're not going anywhere else. Captain, buff us up.
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[Loremaster Blind Flashes the Orc to the right]
Loremaster: Mob on your left.
[Hunter pulls right]
Loremaster: No, your other left!
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Loremaster Trainer: We're supposed to start with these Passive skills first. That's major boring @#$!. Let's do something a little more fun. How about... direct damage.
Loremaster: Gust of Wind? I'm gonna learn Gust of Wind?
[Trainer winks and opens the book]
Loremaster: Holy @#$!
Loremaster Trainer: Hey Mikey, I think he likes it. How about some more?
Loremaster: Hell, yes. Hell yeah.
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Loremaster: I know you're out there. I can feel you now. I know that you're afraid... you're afraid of us. You're afraid of change. I don't know the future. I didn't come here to tell you how this is going to end. I came here to tell you how it's going to begin. I'm going to log off my account, and then I'm going to post on the froums and show these people what you don't want them to see. I'm going to show them a CC that effects Undead. A world without Ancient Evil and Creatures of Nature, without buggy pets or bad pathing. A world where Leechcraft is useful. Where we go from there is a choice I leave to you.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Time to inject a bit of levity into this forum. Yes, we know Loremasters are arguably the most disadvantaged, but let's not stop that from letting us have a good time.
In that spirit, I present the Lorematrix, a spin off on Matrix quotes, applied to our class. This was inspired by a WoW player who originally wrote the 'Shamanatrix' for the Shaman class.
-----------
Loremaster Trainer: "Do not try and CC the wight... that's impossible. Instead, only try and realize the truth"
Loremaster: "What truth?"
Loremaster Trainer: "You have no CC."
Loremaster: "We have no CC?"
Loremaster Trainer: "Then you'll realize, it's not the wight that's dead... it's only yourself."
------
Loremaster Trainer: Throughout Beta 1, we were dependent on our bear to survive. Fate, it seems, is not without a sense of irony.
------
[Loremaster sees a his bear tank a mob - then a second bear getting hit.]
LM: Whoa. Deja Vu.
[Everyone freezes right in their tracks]
Guardian: What did you just say?
Loremaster: Nothing. Just had a little d�j� vu.
Minstral: What did you see?
Burgler: What happened?
Loremaster: My bear was just tanking a mob... then another bear just like it tanked another.
Minstral: How much like it? Was it the same bear?
Loremaster: It might have been. I'm not sure.
Guardian: Hunter! Champion!
Champion: What is it?
Minstral: A d�j� vu is usually a bug in the Lorematrix. It happens when they nerf something!
[One hit, the bear loses half its life]
Hunter: Get it out of there!
[Second hit, bear dies]
Loremaster: Oh no...
----------
Developer: I'm trying to free your minds, Loremasters. But I can only show you the /bug feature. You're the ones that have to use it.
----------
Developer: Loremasters, sooner or later you're going to realize just as I did that there's a difference between knowing the bugs, and fixing the bugs.
----------
Nazgul 1: Never send a Loremaster to do a Healer's job.
----------
[Loremaster comes to Primary Heal in Great Barrows]
Guardian: Loremaster... nobody has ever done this before.
Loremaster: That's why it's going to work.
----------
Developer: Loremasters have a problem with Undead. They believe they are special, that somehow their CC should apply to them. Obviously, they are mistaken.
----------
Hardy Bear: All I do is what he tells me to do. If I had to choose between that and the question marks above my head, I'd choose the question marks.
Loremaster: The question marks aren't real.
Hardy Bear: I disagree, Loremaster. I think that the question marks can be more real than this world. All I do is bug out right here, and you have to watch yourself die.
----------
Customer Service Representative at Turbine: It seems that you've been living two lives. One life, you're a Minstral, member of a respectable in-game Kinship. You have a unique name, pay your repair bills, and you... help your guildmaster level their Guardian. The other life is lived as an Alt, where you go by the alias "Loremaster" and are guilty of gimping nearly every Fellowship combination we have a record for. One of these lives has a future, and one of them does not.
----------
Nazgul 1: How did I beat you?
Loremaster: You... you're ancient evil.
Nazgul 1: Do you believe that my being Ancient Evil has anything to do with my difficulty, in this place? Do you think that's a debuff you're using now?
----------
Herald: I think we can handle one little wight. I sent two Loremasters, they're bringing her down now.
Captain: No, Herald, your Loremasters are already dead.
----------
Loremaster: You know, I know that the Fate stat does nothing. I know that when I buff up that stat, the Lorematrix is telling my brain that I'm gaining more power in combat. After 30 levels, you know what I realize?
[Puts on the +25 Fate Hat]
Loremaster: Ignorance is bliss.
-----------
Loremaster: What are you doing?
Guardian: I'm going with you.
Loremaster: No you're not.
Guardian: No? Let me tell you what I believe. I believe that tanking means more to me than he does to you. I believe if you are really serious about having a good run, you are going to need my help. And since you can neither tank, heal, nor DPS, if you don't like it... I believe you can go to hell. Because you're not going anywhere else. Captain, buff us up.
------------
[Loremaster Blind Flashes the Orc to the right]
Loremaster: Mob on your left.
[Hunter pulls right]
Loremaster: No, your other left!
------------
Loremaster Trainer: We're supposed to start with these Passive skills first. That's major boring @#$!. Let's do something a little more fun. How about... direct damage.
Loremaster: Gust of Wind? I'm gonna learn Gust of Wind?
[Trainer winks and opens the book]
Loremaster: Holy @#$!
Loremaster Trainer: Hey Mikey, I think he likes it. How about some more?
Loremaster: Hell, yes. Hell yeah.
-------------
Loremaster: I know you're out there. I can feel you now. I know that you're afraid... you're afraid of us. You're afraid of change. I don't know the future. I didn't come here to tell you how this is going to end. I came here to tell you how it's going to begin. I'm going to log off my account, and then I'm going to post on the froums and show these people what you don't want them to see. I'm going to show them a CC that effects Undead. A world without Ancient Evil and Creatures of Nature, without buggy pets or bad pathing. A world where Leechcraft is useful. Where we go from there is a choice I leave to you.
